Men Explain Things to Me by Rebecca Solnit

18528190In her comic, scathing essay “Men Explain Things to Me,” Rebecca Solnit took on what often goes wrong in conversations between men and women. She wrote about men who wrongly assume they know things and wrongly assume women don’t, about why this arises, and how this aspect of the gender wars works, airing some of her own hilariously awful encounters.

She ends on a serious note— because the ultimate problem is the silencing of women who have something to say, including those saying things like, “He’s trying to kill me!”

This book features that now-classic essay with six perfect complements, including an examination of the great feminist writer Virginia Woolf ’s embrace of mystery, of not knowing, of doubt and ambiguity, a highly original inquiry into marriage equality, and a terrifying survey of the scope of contemporary violence against women.

Review:

This is one of those books that I’ve been meaning to get around to for a while and I’m glad I did. I didn’t care for Solnit’s A Field Guide to Getting Lost but these essays are a stylistic world apart.

It’s Feminism 201 for those newer to the movement but everyone will get something from it. Personally it reminded me that it’s important to flip the narrative and look at issues from the opposite angle. If there is a rape at a college the women are told to protect themselves – don’t go out alone, don’t walk at night.

Some pranksters put up a poster announcing another remedy, that all men be excluded from campus after dark. It was an equally logical solution, but men were shocked at being asked to disappear, to lose their freedom to move and participate, all because of the violence of one man.

Similarly,

…of sixty-two mass shootings in the United States in three decades, only one was by a woman, because when you say lone gunman, everyone talks about loners and guns but not about men—and by the way, nearly two-thirds of all women killed by guns are killed by their partner or ex-partner.

Feminism past is connected to feminism present, and we are reminded that we will need the movement far into the future. The message can be troubling and infuriating but there’s also a healthy dose of optimism.

I made a ton of highlights and had my mind pleasantly stretched, but I would have liked to see intersectionality discussed more. Women of color, trans women, and others face more awfulness than white, cis women and it deserves to be acknowledged and examined.

But that’s my only complaint. Men Explain Things to Me is a quick read that will stick with me for a long time.

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